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My personal path through life is accompanied by many serious and intense experiences of loss which have had a great impact on my life since I was a child.
The most incisive losses came in my early 30s.
First of all the death of my very best friend, my most important companion, my rock, my shelter, my advisor! I was heavily pregnant and about to get married when it happened – the heart attack which took away my favorite person. Suddenly, in a second, my world shattered.
2 months later my first daughter was born. Sweet as sugar, completely blunt and in the middle of life her presence was indispensable. But a few weeks after her birth the next twist came – the diagnosis – Canavan’s disease.
This disease is a severe physical and mental multiple disability with a shortened life expectancy. Due to this diagnosis, our daughter was already doomed to die. From then on our lives were accompanied by a constant struggle for survival. This disease took away all of my little girl’s quality of life. She also lost her eyesight when she was only 8 months old. Deep, innocent, ocean blue eyes – which from one moment to the next could not see anything anymore. My gorgeous little girl, with her blonde curls and happy kicking, turned into a scared, dysfunctional version of herself and…
what about me? Standing by helplessly, unable to help her in any way. Anxiety, worry, pain and deep turmoil began.
photographer: Anita Krüger @lichtecht_bilderreich
About half a year later a happy event was announced. I became pregnant again. Full of joy, full of hope, full of love but then…
… the result of the diagnosis in the 21st week of pregnancy – in a nutshell – the statement of the doctors: “We are very sorry, but this girl will also be born with the Canavan’s disease.“
There it lay my life, again in ruins, along with my last hope, my last strength.
My baby girl was born and died in my arms 4 hours after birth.
Battered by life, consumed by pain, consumed by helplessness, we continued to fight for the life of our older daughter. It was a hard and fierce fight. Shortly before her second birthday she died of influenza A – also in my arms.
My life was doomed. No more motivation for life. I no longer understood why I should stay here on earth when this life only held pain, suffering and ruins for me. More losses followed – year after year – for 5 consecutive years I lost a loved one to death. Unshakeable emptiness, pain, sadness came over me after all these losses and with all these things I went down.
I found a way with which I could process my grief without feeling overwhelmed and heavy but sustainably and quickly! The key was the Deep Impact Method.
photographer: Anita Krüger @lichtecht_bilderreich
Through coping with grief with the Deep Impact Method I got to know myself in the depths of my being. Today, I can draw the essence of all these experiences to pursue my passion. It is my passion to accompany people transform their grief and support them to achieve their pain-free and loving memory and show them how to start their path to a life worth living. For me it is the most beautiful and fulfilling experience I could ever imagine. This is exactly the reason why I get up every day in the morning!
The secret of the Deep Impact Method is the magic of special emotion processing that strengthens your abilities to come to terms with your feelings in a new way with which you can transform all your pain of loss and use the powerful energy of memory to create your new reality.
Discover your Deep Impact now!
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